Near Death Experiences are fascinating to me mainly because I found myself dying in the hospital back in 1990. And after that, I started to listen to other people’s stories about NDE and found most people had similar experiences.
My parents are staunch Presbyterians. So, growing up under that religion was a full-time practice in my family. But I was always at odds with religion and myself because I could see, hear, and communicate with spirits as a kid! It didn’t make sense to me what I was learning in Sunday school.
When I turned 18 my parents gave me the choice to continue with my faith as a Presbyterian or not! I chose not. Work became my everything and Sunday became football. But I had a solid foundation of my religion. I just didn’t practice it as an adult.
However, I always believed in God and I spoke to him often as a kid. As I grew older, I did not talk to God as much. Sometimes years would go by before I would. But I never stopped believing.
One day in 1990, I fell ill with no real diagnosis, just a lot of theories. I progressively became worse in health to the point of month long stays at the hospital. Long story short, I had a very aggressive disease later diagnosed as Chron’s-Colitis and later colin cancer.
If there was ever a time that I leaned on my faith and God, it was certainly then. I spoke to God daily while in the hospital. Lots of questions with zero answers! I questioned my existence a lot: Is this all that there is? What I am supposed to learn from this? Etc.…
One night while in the hospital, I had fallen to my deepest bottom low with health. I knew I was dying and all I wanted was it to be swift and painless. The physical pain was excoriating. I could only equate the pain to broken glass traveling through my intestines. Just let me drift off into permanent sleep I often told myself.
Then it happened! Late at night. I died! I found myself standing outside my body. I could see myself in bed looking asleep. Then 3 young men, all about my age (20’s) walked in. Only one spoke, “Paul, you have choices, you can come with us, or you can stay here.” “Go where?” I asked. The young man said, “We are your guides, the ones you never bothered to speak to…but we have been with you before your birth and with you all the times you have been born and died over a millennia.” “I don’t understand?” I replied. My guide said again, “You have choices! Stay or go with us.”
In a nano second, I was back in my body. And I slammed hard in to it. The physical pain was extraordinary! When I came to my senses, I must have set off alarms because a crash team was in my room. The RN said, “Hey, you’re back!” “I’m what?” I said sounding confused. The RN replied, “Yeah, we thought we lost you there for a minute.” I felt even more confused and said, “How long was I out?” She said, maybe 45 seconds or more…All I could say was, “What?”
I stayed in the hospital for a few more weeks. I had a lot of time to process my NDE. I never saw the light when I died. Everything seemed accelerated during my death, yet time did not exist! In fact, I had no sense of time. I remember vividly my guide and his words, yet my mouth and his mouth were not moving. But I heard and understood everything. All of that happened under a 1 minute! It was baffling to me.
That morning a man holding a newspaper and two women walked in. The man said he was a Methodist pastor. He looked to be in his 60’s. The pastor, whose name I have long forgotten asked me if they could pray for me! I said, “Sure, go ahead, after last night’s nightmare I could sure use it!”
We all held hands and prayed and they walked out. Minutes later the morning nurse walked in. I told the nurse the pastor forgot his newspaper; it’s at the end of my bed. She said we don’t have visitors, except your family, until after 9am. Apparently, it was only 7am. As she walked out of the room she turned and said, “We don’t have pastors that come here to offer prayers to people.”
Well, it was either the morphine drugs or somehow, I conjured up a newspaper! Was it my guides telling me everything was going to be ok? And that I made a good decision to stay? Or was it a bad decision and they were just telling me good luck kid with that choice! We will send you a pastor to make sure you are ok?
I made it a point to talk to my guides from that time on and I made it a point to chat with God more often. Nothing made sense back then. Today, it all makes sense now. I did make the right choice. My guides faithfully guide me to this day. They show me things from the other side and they warn me and protect me when evil tries to take over.
My near-death experience had me longing to return, especially right after the incident. I do not fully understand that feeling of wanting to return because there is so much to do here. So, for now, I place that thought in a file in my mind and will revisit it another time.
Over time I have become comfortable walking among the spirits and I am no longer defined by any one particular religion. I was never able to conform to the religious social norms: I drink, smoke cigars, I live in Sin City Las Vegas, I gamble, I talk shit, and I worked in a hostile environment of life, death, kill or be killed world. But, now I walk about freely while recognizing all things spiritual.
Today, I no longer have a large intestine thanks to the miracle surgeons at Stanford Hospital! Chron’s-Colitis, and Colon Cancer are all gone!
For me and I speak only for myself on this: I do not fear death like I use to. Death is merely a moment to transition from physical to non-physical. I no longer bind myself to a singular religion. I have expanded to accept and enjoy everyone’s beliefs.
Until next time on Haunted Foodie Traveler…
Body and Mind are temporary vessels for your Spirit.
Live well.
True that! Live well my friend!
I remember this time and all of us being amazed that you survived and even came back to work. Now I understand the complexity, depth and beauty of your experience. Thanks for sharing Paul. 💞
Thank you reading it Sue. Im glad it provided some context for you about my journey.
Great words my friend. I too grew up knowing religion, but in my own way. I like you at times speak offen with him. I have come to understand life and that we are here to experience it everyday. Life is different for each one of us. We have good and bad days, but we also have each other. Keep doing what you love and keep living.
Thank you Mark
Yes.